melodicalchemy

A love so deep it drove me into insanity when everything was over. I've been healing ever since everything had happened. It was a time when anything was possible for me, maybe even romance. Those times are long gone, now. You would have been 29 today. My heart is broken but my body remains alive. If I had a One Wish Willow, I would wish for me and you to meet once again in another life, perhaps one where I realize that love does require a little bit of possession. This is where "love without ownership" left me.   Back then, magic was real and true, and lasting change was on the horizon. 9 years later, and I'm still thinking about you. I wonder what complete oblivion or eternal bliss awaits me in the afterlife. After all, all of our lives are but a blink of the eye from a cosmic perspective. I hope humans were right about God. Then, if and only then, would there be the faith, hope, and love that I struggle to believe in every single day. See you at the movies. 🌹🦉🌟

This is about the only real way to catch up on me and my life because social conventions prevent me from completely spilling the beans.. Anyway, life is so short, and then we all die. I choose to take the agnostic stance when it comes to religion. I want to believe that there is an afterlife and place my faith in a Creator God, but life as it is, perfect yet wholly imperfect is all we get. To continue further, the only things we have reside in the present moment. It’s a wonder how many of our memories are fabricated and are lost to the Sea of Ideas.  I’m in awe of what humanity has created in such a brief span of time. Systems upon systems of interwoven parts, working mechanically and in time. This is the best time in history because it is the only time, and soon we shall return to stardust—from dust we came to dust we shall return. Oh yeah.. I graduated from community college and earned my AA. I wouldn’t have been able to do it without my Mom and Dad. On my end, getting sobe...

 'For if man had all other goods, but not friendship, he would not choose to live.' I've found this statement to be absolutely true. You can have all the latest gadgets and electronics, amenities and luxuries, but if you don't have friends, then you're probably not a happy camper. No one is more sad than a person without friends. I've found that you have to choose your friends wisely, however. You have to be able to take off your mask and just be yourself around your true friends. True friends won't make you wear a mask and walk on eggshells just to fit in. Just because you fit in, doesn't mean you belong. Alone time is peaceful, but over time, without social interaction, the mind begins to run amok. You begin to see danger everywhere and start to recluse even more. You'll even begin to lose desire in solo activities such as reading, gaming, or even watching YouTube, because you're yearning for connection to balance out these endeavors. Nothing w...

One thing I have an issue with nowadays is discerning truth from illusion, or truth and fiction. Who can be trusted to tell the truth? Whose knowledge is verifiable? How exactly can someone be extremely knowledgeable in one regard but completely lack expertise in another? What information do I choose to integrate? Should I even integrate anything they’re saying at all? What is their motive, their agenda? How can I assess one’s character? How can we determine what’s worthwhile for ourselves? Why do some relationships end, and some blossom into lifelong friendships? What is the goal of human endeavor? Will the answer to the previous question differ on a person-by-person basis? What are some of the ways we can provide service? In other words, how do we provide of ourselves in a way that is good for the sake of being good, and not just for a monetary or social gain? I asked the questions, and I answered them as best I could. Here are my answers: Who can be trusted to tell the truth? That d...

​ Drugs and alcohol take away years of your life. You'll be made a fool of yourself so long as you engorge yourself with substances. You'll miss out on the best years of your life and spend so much money and time pursuing something that is slowly killing you and robbing you of your potential to live life on your own terms. Your risk of dying explodes. Your brain will be fucked, and you'll need it for the years of work you'll have to do, hopefully at a job that isn't so soul crushing enough that you question the meaning of it all. You'll be a slave to your neurochemistry, chasing a high and mental state of mind that can only be instated by consuming substances and then abruptly crashing down into your reality, which, by the way, doesn't change positively through drug use or drinking in any good way. Your reputation? Ruined. Your trust in others and most importantly yourself? Shattered. You'll be left alone and won't even have yourself as company. Only...

There's something romantic about driving alone in your car at night listening to music that takes you out of this world. The only thing that matters at the moment is me, myself, and I, in a world that is virtually indifferent to my existence, the mind given free rein to explore reality with a certain flavor that is unique to me and me alone. True romance for me is dead, and so is she, just like the burial of the rose-colored glasses that used to taint my vision of life, clouding sight of how it really is. I'm left with music prompting memories of a distant past that can never be recovered.